Unity in Soul - Ushering in the Solstice

I have finished my fast – we stopped after 20 days, it was long enough and we were ready! LOL

But, seriously, we felt we broke through to the other side of something….into a higher level of this path we have been walking and seeking. So, now is the time to re-build, recover our selves, enjoy the season and eat some wonderful food.

However, today after only a day of eating I feel really well, strong and have been out running. It’s quite a feeling to be detoxed, ready for anything and clear about what has to be done during this next phase of life arriving in the new year.

I have been thinking on these things today as I have been eating lots while working out and getting the house ready for Solstice. This is my absolute favourite time of the year and we have spent the day the sun returns in several locations throughout the years.

Yet, no matter where I am, it’s always nicest to be home, of course, and home is anywhere my family is. 

I find it intriguing how much we are spiritual creatures, yet we can get so caught up in the mundane we often forget it’s deeper connections to these important seasons. Our spiritual selves are actually more accessible, open and in tune with us, as the sun shifts and moves closer to the earth.   

This upcoming Solstice for example, ushers in such an undercurrent of inner soul work with the return of light as well as a festival of great food. This time of feasting has also quite wonderful soul connotations – the beginnings of which are about nourishing all parts of our beings.

After the detox comes the real work of piecing our lives back together, through food, exercise and the closeness of family with the season; we find ourselves – the centre point of our hearts, unity in soul.

April

Gourmet Seaweed & Sea Salt Blend at my market stall 

Fasting & Detox - Mirror Image of the Soul

Day 8

Here I am on day 8 of the second phase of this fast on probiotic juice (Rebel Juice) and I am flying through it. For me the key really is to be busy and that is not a problem in my life. If anything I never have enough time to get all that I want to do, done!

How am I doing so far and is there anything that is different this time around….well, last time I only did 2 weeks on the juice and I felt as if I made huge inroads as far as ‘personal’ stuff was concerned, even though it was easier it was still a detox.

These past few days, I jumped back into the fasting so quickly I have all the usual detox symptoms but am still not tired or as cold as I would have been other times. I put that down to the probiotic juice I am drinking too. 

What I mean by the personal stuff, is this fast has all been about how I view myself, my own self -image, thoughts and feelings about myself. Of course, that also means all those thoughts, ideas, opinions from others who have been a part of my life with specific ideas about who I am or should be – well, all of this has to move sometime too, doesn’t it?

LOL.

So, this time around, the fast is taking me more deeply into this self-image, self perception space – actually, I feel like I am going into my very soul. This is the deepest ocean water I have ever encountered and right now I feel as if part of it might even be totally uncharted because I never know what I will find here.

Yet, I know there is this funny feeling of vague familiarity – I have been here before, but so long ago it has been nearly wiped from my memory. Perhaps for many of us, our souls are a bit like that – hugely vast expanses of space, just waiting to be explored.

I have a sense of knowing that this is the place where I will find all that I am looking for….myself - my mirror image of my soul. 

What you are seeking, is already here.

April

Barley Cove Beach, West Cork

A Shower of Blessings - A Universal Hug

It’s been another few days of fairly steady rain – of which I am attempting (and mostly failing ) to be philosophical about. I mean, it’s only rain and clouds and wind and the sun is no longer visible….so...

However, the air is really something else altogether! It’s light and fresh and uplifting. Today we were walking on the beach (soaked to the skin in 3 minutes) just to get a feeling for this ‘out take of breath’ blowing in from some far off place.

It’s like an elixir. Of life. A blessing....

The earth, no, something bigger and more far-reaching – the Universe – is releasing a new wave of energy I have never felt before; in this lifetime anyway. It’s as if a star has exploded around our solar system and these tiny particles of fairy dust are embedding themselves into our souls.

When I look around me or read what is taking place on the ground it’s often difficult to retain my focus on what is real. Often the darkness can pull at you and suck you into it’s hiding places.

But when I stand back (further some days than others!) and ‘feel’ instead of look and sense instead of ‘analyse’ – the magic is plain to see. Our lives are being affected in the most positive ways by a huge surge of energetic waves.

It’s like a giant Universal hug!

So….back to the rain, the wind and the clouds – the silver lining has been falling for days, washing over us like a breath of clean air – reassuring us, the Universe is alive and dancing in the light. 

April

This Darkness is Not Absolute - Let There Be Light

It’s been a great week so far…the weather has been dry again (I am actually watering my garden) with most of the rain clouds passing us by. Of course, when it’s like this outside my mind automatically runs to – will it last?

And then, when I think about it, I realize I have a pattern of thinking like this in so many other areas of my life as well. It’s a ‘it’s nice/good/better right now, but this will change’ sort of negative expectation.

This theme runs throughout every area of my life (all energetic patterns are like that) and no doubt affects me in a detrimental way. Not only does it take some of the joy out of the present moment, this is fear based thinking at work.

I can see the thread of darkness as it weaves it’s way into my thoughts….Will the work last, will these good feelings stay, will things keep getting better? All the while I am bracing myself for something to change for the worst.

We are so conditioned to expect bad news, negative feelings, heavy energy and have poor experiences. Every single outlet or information source spews out the bad and the ugly, with little good.

This darkness seems absolute.

That’s why when we see a good news story (practically anywhere) we jump on it, people wade in, just to taste the sweeter waters and to soak up some rays. Any glimmer of light is like a magnet for the souls who are seekers.

If experience has taught me anything along these roads I have been walking…it’s this; it does get better, it will change, there is so much good in the world, there is a light that never goes out……

We have to change our minds - recondition our guts to think from a higher, lighter and clearer level (through diet, exercise, fasting, fresh real food). Only then will our thoughts shift from low expectations (or none) to higher more positive expectations with everything.

It’s somewhere deep inside of us, like a pilot light and perhaps the world is finally ready for some brighter sparks to ignite that fire. All we have to do is believe. 

April

 

The Soul & the Well of Hope

It has been quite a week and of course seems like ages since we finished our detox. That's the thing with doing these often, it's not an event, but an incorporated piece of our existence. Something we do, automatically to get the energy moving and to keep it doing just that.

So, there is a lot shifting and shaking for us these days - all thanks to our concerted effort to regain what we have lost, take back the pieces of our souls and move forward in Oneness. Anything you truly want, that's worth fighting for, is worth having.

Energetically speaking you cannot hope to move forward by much or for very long, with only bits and pieces of yourself. Part of the learning while walking this spiritual path is that we are meant to be whole beings (integration) - yet what we start out as is a shell of our former self.

This shell has to be cleared, cleaned and readied for it's ultimate filling up as we journey forward. Of course this is a life's work, an entire process of supernatural proportions that fills our time and minds with it's simplicity. 

Today I feel as if I have come out of a deep tunnel, an excavation of sorts - clearing out the debris of the past. Moving forwards on the path, it's as if this next section will be lit from within - underneath all that cold, dark and heavy energy there is a brightness to be found.

I know that this next leg of my journey is perhaps only beginning - the soul in itself is endless, but with distinctly defined borders, blueprints and maps for the days ahead and a well of hope flowing through the centre.

This well has been uncapped and the water runs sweet.

April

Sunrise

Diseases of the Soul - Fractured Light

We all hear day after day about physical ailments, mental dysfunction and now increasingly emotional disorders. These are becoming all too common in our vocabulary and have entered our consciousness in such a way as to make us certain not one thing about us can possibly be 'normal'. 

Whatever that means....

But we hardly ever hear of spiritual sickness or diseases of the soul as I would refer to them. How do they come about, what does it mean exactly and how on earth would you go about healing such a dysfunction...

Last night I went to bed after giving this topic some careful consideration. Actually I have been thinking about this subject, the soul, spirit, essence or whatever we want to refer to this part of our anatomy as, for quite some time.

It has certainly come into focus for me since doing my last detox - I have been working hard at coming to grips with my own mortal processes in and about the physical spiritual matter. And I have been having some physical symptoms of it's shifting.

My ribs, lower stomach and upper intestines have been sore while my most deeply ingrained patterns of worry, fear and dark energy have been coming up to the surface. There is not one of us untouched in some way at the level of the soul.

We have all experienced our share of lifetimes which left us shattered, broken unable to pick up the pieces of our lives leaving us scattered throughout our own history. Harm and negative intention of others reaching into our DNA.

Perhaps it is only through such a fractured light that we are able to carry on - drawing to us each wandering fragment. Drawn like a magnet towards home.

April

Sunrise this morning in Leap, West Cork

Pictures in My Head - The Spoken Soul

Today feels like a new day - a shift has taken place, of course there is a full moon in the sky and that always makes a nice difference too. The energy of the world just feels different when the moon is full, as if it's full of potential just waiting for us to scoop some of it up.

I am feeling pretty good as well - a little full of food (snacking, cooking and nibbling nonstop!) because of these recipes I am trying out and testing for my new recipe book.  On the one hand it is great to be this involved with my food, but on the other hand, someone has to eat it all!

This week has been an incredible awakening for me in a lot of ways. Perhaps starting with the fox but  even before that - things were already moving up and out. These memories have been here, just below the surface for ever really - I have written about them, talked about them and relived them over and over.

But, they never seem to 'go away' and I'm not sure that is what they are supposed to do. What do you do with memories from other lifetimes that persist because they are like a built in part of your own story. How does one incorporate things that have taken place in times past...

For me, it has not ever been much of a problem and I am not certain it is a problem now. I have always remembered my other lifetimes - as if I have lived continually and indeed I would think in those terms. That my life has only kept going, being born and born again as the same person with the same mission and purpose here on this planet.

The only thing that is different right now is the way things are bubbling up to the surface - I have to remember specific details, names, faces, dates, times and places - in a new way. I have long known the facts, but now there are pictures in my head - and sometimes this is hard to do because it's as if I am living it all again. 

One foot in front of the other, onwards and upwards...

April 

A tiny rainbow in the sky

Broken Pieces - Path of the Soul

I got up this morning bracing myself for more, worse or something bad to happen and right away realized this was a conditioned response of - what - grief, loss? Lifetimes of feeling devastated because of the energy around me and this darkness which has been rising up from the memories I carry. 

Today I should be feeling great - physically I do, my gut works well, I have eaten my porridge with fresh fruit and even had a piece of my Rosemary Sea salt bread (fabulous by the way) - yet I am feeling awful. And I can hardly put words to it - a searing ball of hurt.

Somewhere inside of my soul I have found a broken piece and now I have work to do.

Last night my dreams were scattered, but then so was I for the remainder of my day after we discovered our dead ducks and had to kill the fox. I usually see the spirit of the animal leave fairly immediately after it dies. My ducks essences' have remained while the fox was a full couple of hours before he went his way.

I think it was the way he left that has bothered me since. He moved with such an air of disbelief, yet he knew what he had done. He kept glancing back at me, as if waiting for me to come after him again. He stayed with his body for my benefit, out of defiance, to remind me that there was one duck who got away. 

We have been unable to find one brown duck - she was probably the oldest in the barn and I can sense her around, so I think she was able to fly off. Only now she will be too afraid to return. So hopefully she will see us there today and come home - if she's around, and can trust the barn and us to keep her safe again.

That fox waited even after death to kill the remaining duck and it makes the hair on the back of my neck stand up. Because I was the child who survived an attack on our village in my lifetimes past - I got away, with help from the others, entrusted with the truth of who and what we were and most importantly, what had happened to us. 

Nothing can be erased, not one thing is forgotten - each of the ways and means used to stamp out awakening DNA have failed and will never work because we are designed by nature herself to remember these things. 

A fox cannot kill what he doesn't understand.

April 

Porridge with homemade jam and banana

Pieces of My Soul....

Normally this would be nearly the end of my detox - day 9 out of a usual 10 days. However I am not even halfway yet with this one so I have a few more days to go before I start counting down the days. 

But, it's not so bad. Not at all. I feel as if I am accomplishing so much, inside and out - my mind is in a bit of a muddle though and that is a first for me during a cleanse. Perhaps this level of clearing requires something more from me and focus is far more difficult.

To explain what I sense is taking place -- perhaps it is best to mention my dreams. Last night I was dreaming of banks, souls and contracts... It was actually quite disturbing in some ways. I was sort of traveling throughout my entire lifetime and any dealings with a bank entailed me signing over pieces of my soul.

This is not a nice thought, and an even worse feeling. But, it does make sense and I can see where this is all coming from. Any time we have to sign a contract, it's as if it is written in blood and that liquid is squeezed out of our soul.

So, today I am mulling over these things, working harder at being focused and spending some time being quiet. I just came in from the barn after bringing down treats (apples, kale, kiwi) for the goats, spent some time with them and feel more at peace about things.

Nothing like beautiful animals to put things into perspective. I am also going to do some cooking today- once this cleanse is finished we have a birthday celebration and I want to get a few things done. Even though it is early, puttering around the kitchen always helps me to think and gain insights into what I am walking through at the moment.

Perhaps these 21 days will be another turning point in my life.... I certainly hope so. All I can tell you right now, is that each day I spend detoxing is time well spent. 

April

My daughter with giraffes in the background at Fota Park

It's a Feast Day! Samhain...A Time Lapse Door to the Dead

Well we are all delighted to get this this important feast day on our calendar -- this is a day which has been steeped in magic, change and shifting energy over the centuries. However for the most part, it's deeper meanings remain clear. All you really need do is lightly scratch the surface.

Today being associated with all things that are dead or passed on into these other worlds makes it's meaning clear in that we should look to the shadow realms. Here we will find all that we are seeking - if we dare to pick our way amongst the old bones.

I have long wondered why there is so much fear associated with Halloween - scary night that it is. Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that these doors are not always open to us - what if this one particular door was only open at this one time of the year?

Whatever those of us who are in the living dimensions need to find beyond that door, must then be retrieved at this point. It's a bit like a time lapse - the door opens for a short period of time, we need to go through, do the work on the systems, find what we have lost and return to the land of the living. Intact.

Then again what if we don't really have a choice? What if all of humankind gets thrust into these shadowlands for this brief period of time and then are expected to be able to navigate our way safety back home at the end of the day?

Of course those of us walking a spiritual path would have a particular interest in traversing these boundaries at this time of year - this is 'all souls', or an opportunity to piece back together our souls. Which have been shattered, broken and lost along these lifetimes of change, abuse, fear, hatred and all manner of negativity. Now is an opportunity to set things right. 

Keep looking, there is a long night ahead of us.....

April 

Pumpkin from our full moon ceremony

Getting Back to Myself

I no longer think in terms of being normal, I mean, who wants to be normal anyway, if that means to eat, drink and live mindlessly? No, I am quite happy with my day on/day off fasting while eating, living and being conscious of all that I am.

The physical task of uncovering my heart and soul has taken a long time and it has taught me an incredible amount about myself and the world around me - in particular my relationship with it. I have mentioned here on this blog a few times that there are distinctions to be made between the degrees and levels of inner communication.

Prayer is talking with god

Exercise is being with god

Fasting is walking with god

Each of these are perhaps one and the same in some ways - yet parts of the process of finding and accessing spirit take extraordinary trust, effort and willingness to believe in what is unseen. As an intuitive, seeing is not believing, that would only cause me to question more deeply.

Each day I am taken further into the garden where trust comes about only by believing that the path is in front of you, the bridge is under your feet and that there will be help along the way. For me re-connecting with the old ways of water fasting, herbs and clean living has served to deepen my ability to trust in every aspect of my body. 

These past two days post Master Cleanse have been transformational for me in many ways - I have had decisions to make regarding how I would like to move forward as well as the usual cutting of ties that hold me back. I am standing right now at the edge of a cliff and I plan to cross over - living this way (food, fast & feast) has brought me here and is leading me home.

The sun has finally come out in West Cork,

April

Light Shining Through the Depths